_______________I'M SORRY, TINKY WINKY BY MICHAEL COLTON (02/12/99)

Indeed, there are dozens of cartoon and children's show characters that are at least as gay as Tinky Winky of the "Teletubbies." How about Velma of "Scooby Doo" fame, the most widely accepted lesbian of '70s nostalgia? Even better, what about Peppermint Patty and Marcie? How about the two effeminate Disney chipmunks, Chip and Dale? The list goes on and on. Nor should it stop with mainstream cartoons. Am I the only one who's noticed the disturbingly relentless phallic imagery of the supposedly "Christian" cartoon, "Veggie Tales"? Granted, it's hard not to make a cucumber or a carrot phallic, but surely there's something else going on here. I saw one where Larry the Cucumber thrust his oblong bulk repeatedly against a faucet until the water gushed forth most orgasmically. Tinky Winky looks damned tame by comparison. I would remind Jerry Falwell that it's hard to see the stars when you're looking for dogshit. For a man who spends so much time and effort looking for the devil, I'm surprised he can ever see God. -- Scott Standridge As silly as Jerry Falwell often sounds, the smug indignation of the media (read: the left) dropped like a rock upon reading Michael Colton. Go back over last week's papers -- Falwell is sold as a kook, a crazy man who sees fags hiding in places where Joseph McCarthy used to see commies. More than a year ago, the sexless purple being had been usurped by gay groups "as the first queer hero of children's TV because he often carries around a big red purse." Interesting. When Falwell does the same he's a boob and an oaf. As usual, the media shows its disdain of Christianity and middle America. It's not how something is said (think niggardly) -- it's who says it. -- Jeffrey Abelson New York Michael Colton claims that the Teletubbies are "non-gendered" and that Tinky Winky's "size and voice are vaguely masculine." As the mother of a 2-year-old who went through a Teletubbies phase, I can tell you that Tinky Winky and Dipsy are described as "he" and Laa-Laa and Po as "she." (By the way, the women at my office now refer to their purses as "magic bags.") -- Lori Pickert N E X T+P A G E+| If Tripp looked like Cindy Crawford, would we hate her as much?