X-Word 5-Minute Mystery






THE LISTRESS
BY AMY WALLACE

Test your knowledge
of greater and lesser arcana
against Salon's Listress.

The first person to e-mail
us with the correct answers
will win a $25 gift
certificate from Borders
Books & Music.

Euphemism, Me-phemism
 

1. What activity are the following euphemisms for?

1. Eat cauliflower
2. Wind up the clock
3. Drive home
4. Have a Northwest Cocktail
5. Introduce Charlie
6. Parallel park
7. Buzz the Brillo
8. Make the chimney smoke
9. Talk about Uganda

2. Which of the following is not a euphemism for vomiting?

1. Make a sale
2. Yuke
3. Tease Louise
4. Snap your cookies
5. Sell Buicks

3. Which of the following is not a euphemism for dying or being dead?

1. Poison the patch
2. Raise the wind
3. Tip over
4. Stick your spoon in the wall
5. Pull a clock
6. Gone for a Burton


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May 16, 1997


The winner of the last Listress was Patrick Dolan, who was the first to answer the following questions correctly:

1. These are the last lines of 10 famous novels. Identify the title and author.

1. "Yes," I said. "Isn't it pretty to think so?"
2. It is a far, far better thing that I do, than I have ever done; it is a far, far better rest that I go to, than I have ever known.
3. "Very good, sir," said Jeeves.
4. Catherine, meanwhile, in the parlor, picking up her morsel of fancy-work, had seated herself with it again -- for life, as it were.
5. John Thomas says good night to lady Jane, a little droopingly, but with a hopeful heart.
6. After all, tomorrow is another day.
7. Glory, as anyone knows, is bitter stuff.
8. At the edge of the Arab quarter the car, still loaded with people, made a wide U-turn and stopped; it was the end of the line.
9. Somebody threw a dead dog after him down the ravine.
10. And out again, upon the unplumb'd salt, estranging sea.

Answers:

1. "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway
2. "A Tale of Two Cities" by Charles Dickens
3. "Right Ho, Jeeves" by P.G. Wodehouse
4. "Washington Square" by Henry James
5. "Lady Chatterly's Lover" by D. H. Lawrence
6. "Gone With the Wind" by Margaret Mitchell
7. "The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea" by Yukio Mishima
8. "The Sheltering Sky" by Paul Bowles
9. "Under the Volcano" by Malcolm Lowry
10. "The French Lieutenant's Woman" by John Fowles

2. These are the first lines of 10 famous novels. Identify the title and author.

1. "Jeeves," I said, "may I speak frankly?"
2. For a long time, I used to go to bed early.
3. Call me Ishmael.
4. Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.
5. Mother died today.
6. Robert Cohn was once middleweight boxing champion of Princeton.
7. Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.
8. Howard Roark laughed.
9. "Christmas won't be Christmas without any presents," grumbled Jo, lying on the rug.
10. It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love.

Answers:

1. "Right Ho, Jeeves" by P.G. Wodehouse
2. "Swann's Way" by Marcel Proust
3. "Moby Dick" by Herman Melville
4. "Anna Karenina" by Leo Tolstoy
5. "The Stranger" by Albert Camus
6. "The Sun Also Rises" by Ernest Hemingway
7. "Rebecca" by Daphne du Maurier
8. "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand
9. "Little Women" by Louisa May Alcott
10. "Love in the Time of Cholera" by Gabriel García Márquez

3. Which author used the following similies?

1. "dead as a pickled walnut"
2. "gaudy as a chiropractor's chart"
3. "as easy to spot as a kangaroo in a dinner jacket"
4. "all the originality and drive of a split fingernail"
5. "shorter than a bargain-counter shirt"

Answer: Raymond Chandler


Amy Wallace is the co-author of many books, including "The People's Almanac," and the author of "The Prodigy," a biography, and "Desire," a novel. She lives in Los Angeles.

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