For us, the Millennium Bug is like a field of truffles to a French pig.

Certainly the Y2K issue has changed the way ordinary people view us. It used to be that when cocktail-party talk turned to careers, "software tester" got the same blank-stare-then-yawn reaction as, say, "tax auditor." The average citizen took very little interest in our work, and we labored in obscurity.

Nowadays, of course, it's another story. As the clock counts down and the media spotlight shines brighter, we find ourselves the center of quite a bit more attention than we're used to. On January 1, 2000, will the populace be left incommunicado in the cold and dark? Will the nuclear bombs detonate? Governments, investors, our friends and family want to know. We are presumed to have Inside Knowledge. We are the planet's stalwart defenders against the Forces of Chaos.

Would now be a good time to ask for a raise?

Like all occupations, software testing has a hierarchy. The higher up you go, the wider your range of vision -- and your accountability.

Most testers are cautious, empirical people by nature, so when asked about the progress of our Y2K efforts, we usually answer according to our personal experience. In organizations where the testing began years ago and resources were plentiful, you'll find junior and mid-level testers saying that, yes, things are under control. But no matter how forward-thinking, well-managed or lavishly funded his or her information technology department, I doubt there is a senior Quality Assurance (QA) manager anywhere who doesn't occasionally wake up at night with a panic attack over some rogue variable.

To understand why this is the case, we'll have to go behind the scenes of the Y2K testing efforts at your average medium-sized American business. I've created a composite view-from-the-cubicles of Everycorp, Inc., pieced together from a number of testers at companies, agencies and nonprofit groups in different industries and regions.

Let's assume that we're in a U.S. business with operations in Europe, Asia and Latin America. We've got mainframe systems, client-server databases, Web sites and a multitude of employee-created Word templates, Excel macros and Access databases filled with date fields.

The tale begins in the spring of 1997. Everycorp's information technology staff is busy with the usual crises: system upgrades, viruses, unreasonable demands from the marketing department. A developer receives a promotional copy of a magazine about Y2K problems and circulates it. A tester attending a QA conference hears presentations by testers from international banks and brokerages about their Y2K compliance projects and fires off a nervous e-mail to the entire department. The department manager goes to an expensive seminar sponsored by a revered management consulting group and decides the entire Y2K problem is a scam. Meanwhile, everyone's attention is riveted by a new phenomenon called the World Wide Web.

Fast-forward to Thanksgiving. It's now budget season, and managers are arguing over how to slice the 1998 pie. Senior management, through its mysterious golf resort and boardroom grapevine, has heard that the Millennium Bug could put us out of business. A decree goes forth: All critical systems shall be compliant by 12/31/98. Funds are allocated. Objectives are set. The organization springs into action.

A Y2K product manager is appointed. This ambitious individual possesses a snazzy wardrobe, the stamina for endless meetings and a penchant for writing voluminous reports -- and is not sorely missed by software developers actually doing work.

The legal department agonizes over definitions: What is the difference between "Y2K ready" and "Y2K compliant"? The lawyers determine which dates need to be tested and certified. (Not just 1/1/00, but 2/29/00, and many others.) They prepare lists of documentation testers must submit to prove that Everycorp's systems have been tested.

Corporate Communications arranges for employees to receive a daily news feed of alarming Y2K articles from the world press. They prepare guidelines for how to speak to outsiders about Y2K. Basically (just in case a stray investor, regulator or member of the press might be listening), they want the dialogue to go like this:

Concerned Citizen: So how's the Y2K bug going to affect you at Everycorp?

Tester: It's not. We've almost finished testing. All our mission-critical systems run fine.

Concerned Citizen: Really? Already?

Tester: Sure. We expect to be done by the end of 1998.

Concerned Citizen: Wow. What a great company.

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